Let Growth Flourish

Growth. That word is so exciting to see and even better to experience. When people see the word, they immediately correlate it with abundance. Most of us want to grow our family, money, and physical health. Those are all important, but I also want to squeeze in there mental health.

To me, everything begins and ends there. Ultimately, that’s why I started smoking weed. I got to the point where I was comfortable giving it a try to help me control my anxiety. I had no clue it would allow me to learn about who I am.

Delectable strain of the evening. | Photo credit: Weedphotos.com

I’ve learned so much about my strengths and I’ve learned even more from my weaknesses. I was able to ask myself the question “why am I anxious in this situation?” I knew there was a root to the anxiety, but I didn’t know what. Eventually, I began to ferret out the roots to various problems, thus beginning my transformation.

But, like all things in this life, it must be learned and practiced. I have so many days during which I feel completely overwhelmed. Sometimes throwing up my hands seems like a really good idea in the moment, but I’ve learned that way of thinking is only a learned and practiced behavior. I can always learn and/or implement something better.

Growing isn’t always easy or pretty, but it’s always worth it in the end.

That’s where I am now. I’m actively learning and practicing new skills daily. My sole desire is to be able to give the perfect amount of my energy to exactly the right subject. I don’t want to be conflicted about things that shouldn’t even matter to me. I want to be assured and confident in all decisions.

With goals like that, I know I’m going to need some help from people who harness the skills I need development with. So, I’ve decided I want a life coach. Yeah, I’ve totally become one of those people who actually wants a life coach. LBVS. Obtaining a life coach is the next like a suped up mentor. Here’s my rationale…

Photo credit: Coachthelife.com

If I had someone whose entire purpose during our interactions was to help me implement changes permanently, I’d get a turbo boost for this transformation journey. I feel the same way about mental/emotional counseling. A patient pays for a professional’s time and education to help sort out his/her sh*t. The same perspective can be applied to the assistance of a life coach.

If any of my lovely readers know a life coach reasonably priced in Los Angeles, don’t be stingy! Sharing is caring, friends, so please slide into my DM (aka the contact page found here) with the deets. 😘 Have you ever used a life coach or considered doing so? Let me know in the comments below.


In addition to the life coach decision, I’m also in the process of adding new people to my circle of friends. I really need the extra boost having purposeful relationships can provide. That’s not to say that my existing circle isn’t purposeful, but as I change, so do my activities and opinions. It’s time to add some new blood to the mix.

Dean told me earlier this week that since he values his energy and space, he’s extremely selective about who gets an invitation into his life. At first, that didn’t make a ton of sense to me because I’m such a social butterfly, but the more I think about this with my new perspective, the more sense his logic makes!


So, that’s what’s happening in my mind/world this week. Lots of self-reflection within all my various roles (mother, daughter, girlfriend, etc.) underway and I have to say that I’m really happy to do so. It’s been a long time coming and it feels good to grow. I hope you’re growing, too. As always, thanks for the read. ♥

Til next time,

Hardy Har

The Pursuit of Higher Self








Hey guys and welcome back to my blog! I hope you know how much I appreciate the visit.

Today’s post is a short and sweet one. Actually, I have noticed that most of the Activeps_1219_high_kite High Sesh posts are shorter. Makes sense being that I’m high as a kite while I’m writing AHSs.

Anyway, this one is the first post I’ve written that features a #killercombo. I think this is something I will do once a week with AHSs going forward. Since Dean loves making super awesome combinations for us to indulge in, I thought it would be cool to give them a write-up for some of my fellow Cannalovers to try out.

As always, tread carefully with these combos. We smoke a lot of heavy-hitting sativas and ALL of our strains are premium quality so the highs can be much more impacting. If smoking is newish to you, please don’t try to blow your top off with the combos I mention. There are levels to this shit. Take each one and build up your tolerance. Haha! Now, let’s get into it!

6:20 Dean and I started working out about 5:30 and he decided to make a #killercombo workout mix for us this evening and the shit BLEW ME AWAY! And since it did, I decided to call this combo Blown Away. Guys, it’s so damn good. Here’s what’s all mixed in:

Layer 1. Charge 504 (sativa)

Layer 2. Super Lemon Haze Concentrate (sativa dominant hybrid)

Layer 3. Durban Poison (sativa)

Layer 4: Super Lemon Haze Concentrate

Layer 5: Super Jack (hybrid)

Look at all the lush kush.


Okay, so I know you’re probably thinking, “these MFs might not make it” based on that crazy mixture of premium Cali kush, but on the contrary my friends, we are thriving! This combination completely transformed my already intense workouts. I mean, I was EXTRA with it tonight! We worked out intensely just under an hour.

Back in the day, I would have cringed to workout for even 20 minutes and now suddenly I’m enjoying an hour long sweat fest?! Seriously, who the. hell. am. I? Lol! I am so elated that I’ve gotten to the point that something that I loathed before has become something I  now love. Such a breath of fresh air.

About the high: Alright, so I think you get the drift that this sh*t is an energy turbo boost, BUT what I also want you to know is that about an hour into that turbo boost (with intense workout), the high will mellow into an energetic focused high, et voila! That’s how I’m able to write this post free of pesky energy shakes and hyperactivity! Thanks to the super awesome Super Lemon Haze coming through with it’s happy energy and easy focus, the high never turns into a sativa overload. It also helped that we worked out like maniacs. 6:43

BLOWN AWAY had me feeling like this guy.

7:05 Wow. Didn’t think 20 minutes passed already! Lol Well, I can’t say I expected this high to allow me to be ultra focused, but it does allow for a decent amount of productivity time. I can’t help with homework right now, but I would be super fun playing a game or having a dance sesh with the Kiddo. She’ll be home soon so I’ll be able to wear her out with some silliness before she heads to bed. 7:07


7:08 I’m feeling a major energy boost which means I am going to take a hiatus and workout for a bit until it’s dancing time. 7:09

7:21 LMAO I literally sat right here grooving to this Eve song Dean is playing! 😂 Let me try that again. Haha. 7:21

kb8:14 Back! One of the things I meant to note earlier about my working out is that I almost NEVER workout in my actual, over-priced, extra tight workout clothes anymore. I will literally start doing weight reps and cardio workouts in whatever I’m wearing at the moment. I even do it in pajamas; in fact, I busted mad moves with the kettlebell in my nightgown tonight. 😂 Lol! I don’t let anything stop me from working out. If it’s on my task list (which it is), it’s getting done. Laundry day? No problem! Get it in in your underwear! Lol. It’s actually pretty fun. 😉 Haha! 8:27

8:59 I think I’m going to wrap this little post up for the night. I just smoked ANOTHER combo called #DAINTY and it’s an indica dominant hybrid combo so I want to try some meditation. My energy has been a little twacked this week. Time to find the center…or try to. 9:01

Til next time,

Hardy Har

The Pursuit of Higher Self




Setback or Come-Up?

Menu: Lamb’s Bread/Breath + Pink Lemonade + Green Goddess

Eats: Taco Bell + Southern Girl Desserts (yummmmm)


8:45 Hey guys, thanks for coming back! I get supremely gleeful when people donate their time to read my musings. #WarmNFuzzy

Today has been an interesting day. I awoke with a sunny disposition that would rival any of our best SoCal sunny days, but somewhere during the course of the day, a funk began to settle in. By the early evening, I had a serious case of the Mondays.

My sentiments exactly!


Next thing I knew, I was second-guessing all of my progress and just being a general b*tch to myself. The good news is I made sure to not negatively impact someone else’s day. The bad news is my bad mood felt more like a setback!

Yeah, I said it. I had a setback and guess what: I’M HUMAN and so are you! We are all entitled to make mistakes or be in a bitchy mood. That’s apart of the experience and those moments are necessary in order to appreciate the other side of the coin. In other words: appreciate the sh*t just as much as the glitter.

So, how did I get myself out of that funk? I had help from my mentor. Yup, remember step 3 from my last blog post (click ➡ here ⬅ in case you missed it)? Well, I am all about putting my own advice to use, so I leaned pretty hard on my mentor/boyfriend, Dean.

And just to keep the theme of following step 3 going, Dean did an exercise with me that his mentor did with him! Love it!! Anyway, the task was to create a table comprised of three columns and 15 rows. Above each column, I wrote the headers Skills, Behaviors, and Need to Learn. See my example below.


I’m sure you can see where this is going. I filled out the chart under each header and *spoiler alert* it was really hard for me to come up with my skills! Keep in mind that “skills” can be pretty much anything. I had difficulty identifying my skills because I would judge the skill as irrelevant.  In doing so, I inadvertently learned a lesson about my confidence and the areas for improvement there. #Twofer! Ultimately,  writing and networking were added to the list.

The next column I filled out was the “behaviors” section. Here is where I listed my actual behaviors. If you are doing this exercise, please keep your mind open, just like I advised above. Don’t think of things as “good” or “bad.” Here’s an example of my second column. And yes, I really did write “laziness” down. Part of the growth journey is being honest with myself, even when the truth isn’t favorable.

Writing Chatting on social media
Networking Laziness

By now, you know what I did next. Yep, filled out the last column. This section was the easiest one for me to complete. There is a TON of information I need to learn so I literally just picked the most important 15!

Writing Chatting on social media Stronger parenting skills
Networking Laziness Time management

By this point in the exercise, my crappy mood was beginning to dissipate. Of course it didn’t hurt that I toked a bit on some that good-good Lamb’s Bread concoction to speed the process along. hehe! Next, Dean told me to write down all the behaviors I didn’t want on a separate space of my paper. For this example, there’s only one undesirable behavior and that’s “laziness.” What? Social media is my bread and butter. No way I can stop being a virtual social butterfly! 😇


For the last step of this exercise, I decided to put my own twist on it. I picked one item from each column and formed an affirmation. That affirmation will be the focus of the day for me tomorrow. Here’s how my affirmation came out: “I am an active writer who gets her tasks completed.” I swapped out “laziness” for “active” because lazy is NOT something I want to be!From there, it’s all about putting my affirmation to work for me. I decided to make a daily task list to help me with my time management and productivity. So, we shall see how it goes tomorrow! I am really excited and I am in a much better space mentally, emotionally, and spiritually than I was at the beginning of the activity. And for sh*ts and giggles, I decided to turn it into a blog post. How’s that for productive? 😋



I wrote the above post on 12/4/17, but am behind with posting it; however, I wanted to give a summary of how the day went based on my activity.

I woke up with a plan and I stuck to it. I told myself that I was going to put my affirmation into practice and I did. That singular thought set my entire day into a positive direction, but if I’m keepin’ it real, what I did wasn’t a profound act of humanity. It’s something millions, even billions of people do every single day, but for some of us, getting ourselves on the right path is a lot harder for one reason or another.


For me, one of those reasons is I’m a sexual assault survivor. Living with a secret like that would make anyone veer off the road a bit, but the good news is that I decided 6 years ago that my life was going to be different. The best news is that it IS different and my light is finally shining! Corny, but so ridiculously true and I love it!

Each moment that passes brings with it a chance to break the cycle. I finally snatched my chance. I broke my cycle and I will continue breaking it over and over and over again until I finally am Higher Self. It’s only up from here, with my trusty side kick, Mary Jane, of course. 😉 😤  Needless to say, the minor setback I had on Monday, became a great teaching moment for me. It’s safe to say I had a MAJOR come-up! #Winning!

Til next time, friends.

Hardy Har  

The Pursuit of Higher Self